2005 All KING Team

Call KING Nostradamus 'cause our predictions are more on-point than Tom Brady facing down an all-out blitz. We knew Ki Toy Johnson and her delectable derrière would body readers, and we were willing to bet our publisher's paycheck that the Double-R Phantom would become the rapper's new chariot of choice. Now, we're forecasting the NFL's pro-bowl team. (Hey Paul Tagliabue, if someone on this list isn't doing the Hula dance in Hawaii come January, consider terminating your selection committee.) What skills were required in order to be selected to our 22-member gridiron squad? Simple. Get double-digit touchdowns, grab a game-changing pick, block a field goal for the W, rush for 1,600 yards, catch a drive-sustaining first down, make a strong throw through December winds, stuff the run, de-cleat the quarterback, get blood on your shirt, get blood on his shirt, make opposing coaches circle your name in their meetings, make the cover of a video game, among other things. n And if you were unable to do all that, telling your organization to kiss your ass (Moss, Owens: holla!) was a fine alternative. Break!