The Boob Tube

What would my Monday be without some reality? Whose reality? Not my reality, but VH1's "celebreality.” Their spin-offs of spin-offs started new seasons last night and I have to admit I Love Money 2 and For the Love of Ray J are two of my guilty pleasures. (I have many. lol) Two hours of pure entertainment from Rock of Love rejects, Flavor of Love flops and I Love New York losers; oh and one extraterrestrial named "It!”(I Love New York 2). He's more interesting than Myamme (Flavor of Love 3) and the lingerie she vows to wear every episode.

I Love Money 2

Just like he was last time we saw him, I Love Money's The Entertainer is still living in his parent's basement and Tailor Made (I Love New York 2) still suffers from bitch-assness. I absolutely love Angelique (Rock of Love). The only two words she knows in English are money and naked. Buckwild is still "black.” She's on the show to grab the $250,000 to pay back her mom for paying her lawyer fees. Then there's "It.” He wants to open up a chicken spot if he wins and T-Weed (I Love New York 2) wants to open a credit union in the hood (good luck on getting paid back).

The first challenge of the season consisted of swimming in what looks like a big tub of shit to find coins. T-Weed and 20 Pack came out on top with the most coins, which made them team captains. 20 Pack picked reality veteran The Entertainer first and appointed him his general. As gay as it sounds, and in true hater fashion, they plot against Buddha (I Love New York 2). Of course, Buddha wants to beat everyone up like always and no one expects him to get picked, but, low and behold, T-Weed saves him by picking him on his team and Buddha doesn't have to be with rival Bitch-Made (I mean Tailor-Made). Poor crybaby Leilene (Charm School) winds up squaring off with Tamara (Rock of Love) in an arm wrestling match for the last spot. To my surprise, Tamara's retard strength didn't prevail and she was kicked off.

Winner of the Night: Buddha. They should have kicked him off while they had the chance.

The season look's promising though. Someone makes out with Angelique (WTF?!), Leilene falls in love, Buddha fights (a female this time) and Myamme is naked half of the time.

Of course I'm going to be watching, so onto the next…

For The Love of Ray J

Oh, Ray J. No wonder Kim K. was so into him. He has this playboy swag and his voice is so smooth I didn't know if he was singing or talking. Whatever it was it was seductive. All in all you can't help but keep watching as the drama unfolds on his search for love. He's looking for a sexy female and I have to admit these women are better looking than most of the other VH1 reality celebs. He even brought his relative along to assist him along the way and even she looks good.

The ugly does begin to come out when the ladies realize there are only 12 beds and 14 of them. Christa wastes no time drinking a bottle of wine, and I mean the whole bottle. (Liquor and love go hand and hand on channel 19). In true VH1 fashion, Ray-J joins his hopefuls at a dinner table to give them names. Caviar, Atomic Bomb, Danger, Stilts and Unique are just some of the standouts. Caviar doesn't speak English. Actually, I don't think she speaks any language because no one can understand her. Atomic Bomb doesn't even know what an atomic bomb is and Danger has a tiger on her face. Stilts is a giant and Unique had, um, unique hair (Cocktail referred to her as "poodle head” and a "P.E teacher”). Ray J asked for some entertainment and Chardonnay popped into earth shattering splits. Of course the other ladies got their hate on and complained, but it didn't matter because Chardonnay wound up getting the last chain that night. He sent home Naturalle and Hot Cocoa who was as boring as Cashmere and Genuine's splits.

Winner of the Night: Chardonnay. Definitely beat it like a cop!

The trailers coming up give you a glimpse of stripper poles, boxing matches and make-out sessions worth waiting up til' 10:30 for. Not to mention the fact that Ray J's "tool” was compared to an entire Italian bread. I'm tuning in every week, hoping for a wardrobe malfunction. HeHe

So make sure you check with me. Keeping you posted on everything juicy.—Shamika B. Sanders

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Some pictures grabbed from VH1