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20 years from now you're gonna want to kick your own ass. Two decades from now when your kids' kids are asking you about Tiger Woods, you're not going to have anything of substance to say. Yeah, you'll know that he won a lot of green jackets at the Masters and that he wore bloodshot red on Sunday to intimidate the rest of the field. But what else? Trust and believe, your grandchildren are going to ask if all the tales they've read on the internet are true about Eldrick "Tiger” Woods. Please, for the kids, have something more to say than, "Yeah, that boy sho' could hit that little ball far.”

Instead, tell them… "That young man was capable of making grown men hide like little children. And he did it all with a million-dollar smile. Opponents like Ernie Els and Phil Mickelson wouldn't actually say they gave up, but their body language and sad, sad scores over the weekend would all but yell it. Baby, the man was 40-3 (13-0 in major tournaments!) when he was holding at least a part of the lead going into the final day of play. If that isn't a sign of greatness, your grand dad don't think signs of greatness exist.”

Or you could say… "The man was a magician. Not the David Blane kind of magician. This kind I'm talking about is real. Tiger could play almost any course, at any time, under any conditions. By the end of the summer of '07, he had won events in 14 states and heaven knows how many countries. The 31-year-old Woods had 59 PGA Tour victories before his daughter Sam's first birthday. The 59th, in fact, came at the prestigious PGA Championship, under Tulsa's brutal 100 degree heat. By the 18th hole on Sunday, Woods' shirt was dripping in sweat. Still he kept a steady putter and won a major for a third straight year for a second time in his career.”

You could even go… "People always want to compare Tiger to Jack Nicklaus, and that's fine. Greatness mirrors greatness. But in my eyes, he was better than Jack. With technology and hectic travel schedules and the pestering media, there's just so much out there distracting Woods. Nicklaus only had to deal with a fraction of those issues. Yeah, you gotta respect Jack's 18 majors, but Tiger's gonna end up with 25 or 30. And we won't even get into the over $73 million he's won on the greens.”