To Key Or Not To Key
No! I don't mean keying someone's car (all my Next Friday Day-Day fans out there LOL) because they cheated on you or you're just plain hating because their car is a little nicer than yours. What I'm asking is, when is the right time to give the person you're dating a key to your place? Or should you even do it at all? If you do decide to take it to that level, in my opinion, that equates to making a very strong commitment. Is it as important or challenging like giving someone the key to your heart? Think about it, the key to your home is letting someone enter your safe haven where you retreat when you're sick or just want to be alone. Your home represents you and is a reflection of who you are. Even inviting someone over is a form of trust, no matter what surrounds your home. Once someone enters and closes that door, you're letting your guard down. Now the key to your heart is the same but in an emotional form. A home is a material possession, if it's damaged it's a lot easier to fix, but when it's your heart the healing process can take a little longer (insert Luther Vandross song here lol). Then again depending on the person you are, the home and heart may be interchangeable.
Do you say, okay, this person is the "one" so it's time to give them a key to my place? Me personally, both of our names would have to be on the deed for anyone else to have key. I'm not a big fan of pop-up visits (ask my brother, I think he's healed by now lol). If I'm going out of town and I need someone to check on the house, then I will give them a key (then again, there is such a thing as duplicating lol). Really, would it be safe if you were engaged or if you've known this person for a long time and would you expect them to return the favor? Accepting a key to someone's home is a very large responsibility. Not only are you responsible for that key, in a way you're also responsible for everything in that home. If that person lives alone and something comes up missing or is misplaced, most likely you're the first person they will think of. The question you would have to ask yourself before giving or receiving a key is are you really ready for that type of commitment?
"Never pretend to love which you do not actually feel, for love is not ours to command.â€ â€“ Alan Watts
Much love to James Mark for the photo and GT for the idea!