Tired of getting the cold shoulder from Americans, Canada offers Nadia Dawn as a peace offering. We'll reconsider deporting Celine Dion in exchange

Time to bury the hatchet and kill the South Park cracks. Truth is, Canada's not so bad, with its maple syrup, peace-loving politics and French-speaking natives. Despite Keanu Reeves, there are some clear positives to America's stepchild. n Even though the U.S. population is nine times Canada's, our culturally elitist neighbor boasts a higher literacy rate, free healthcare, less crime and gorgeous women. "Don't be mad that Canadians girls are a better package,” purrs voluptuous 25-year-old Nadia Dawn, a Guyanese goddess who has spring-boarded a music-video career into acting roles in Soul Food, hosting duties on HBO's popular pay-per-view show Super Model Shoot and the upcoming independent film, The Easy. "Plus, we can get you the best Cuban cigars, because we still trade with Cuba.” n Well, if the little country that could wants to give KING presents, far be it from us to look a gift horse in the mouth.

Who has better game?
American or Canadian men? Easily, American guys. They are really smooth. Canadian guys will say something like, "Honey you dropped something.” And I turn around and he goes, "Sweetness” [laughs]. Canadian guys are nerds.

What kind of fun are we talking about?
I'm a no-strings-attached woman. Guys that deal with me know what they are getting themselves into. One guy I met kept on sending me bottles of hot sauce for two years because he thought I was so hot. He'd send me these T-shirts that said "Hot As Hell.”