Ladies and Gentlemen, it is my esteemed honor and privelige to announce the first annual Miss Fine Sh*terature competition. Right now, King Magazine is in the middle of their own "Web Girl of the Year" competition, with three absolutely STUNNING models vying for the top spot. It's a win-win-win situation for everybody, especially my fellow lovers of gorgeous women.

I've been here long enough that I decided it's time I gave y'all something other than sh*t talk and jokes at the expense of others. I plan to contribute to the lovely visuals on this site with this contest, and hopefully bring some extra exposure and recognition to some beautiful young lady in the process. Ladies, here is what comes with being Miss Fine Sh*terature:



  • You get to wear a real tiara, not a Photoshopped like in banner above.
  • CONSTANT recognition, shout-outs and free plugs over here, and on
  • Your choice of shirts from my store.
  • Invites and admission to events(if you happen to be in the DC area) where you can even wear the tiara and talk sh*t to all the lesser b*tches in the club that want your spot.
  • I might even make a sash to go along with it, so you can REALLY f*ck with people!
  • A role written for you in one of the comedy videos being produced for

That's about all I can promise for now...Maybe the prizes will get better if King decides to make this official and throw in a little something...

*COUGH* Helpan*ggaout *COUGH*

Either way, all you have to do to enter is send an e-mail to with your name, a couple of photos(or a link to your website/myspace/facebook etc.), and a few words saying why you think you'd make the perfect Miss Fine Sh*terature. It's THAT simple. The deadline is July 6th at midnight. The finalists will then be showcased here on the site, and next I'll name a winner.

Good luck, and I will start shopping for the most pimped-out tiara that I can find.


Yeah...I said it