Anyone who attended a historically black college or university will probably tell you what the experience was like in five words: You had to be there. As Stomp The Yard went number 1 at the box office for the second week in a row, it seems like a lot more people are getting a glimpse about life on an HBCU campus.  From step-shows to women who actually look better than Meagan Good, an HBCU is far different than traditional institutions of higher learning. Every student who attends one will probably have a different opinion, which is why we're hoping Hollywood will be more open to telling more stories like Stomp The Yard. So to give those agents and studios up in the hills some ideas, several people who actually attended an HBCU have decided to write their own mock scripts. Remember, if the writers themselves didn't live it, they saw it with their own eyes.

Movie Title: Welcome to Homecoming

Cast:
LaToya Cobb – Kyla Pratt
Provost Jenkins – Alfre Woodard
President Mims – Danny Glover
Other SGA Members – Nick Cannon, Terrence J, Donnell Rawlings, and Hoopz

Plot Outline: The Student Government Association's efforts to put together a successful week of activities for students and alumni takes a sharp turn when SGA members run into several roadblocks that puts their plans in jeopardy.  Several hip-hop artists mysteriously cancel a week before the big concert. The venue for the fashion show is somehow double-booked. The frats and sororities are being 'investigated', putting the step show in question. The band is banned from playing at the football game for hosting an off-campus party. And SGA members are accused of stealing ticket sale revenue, which could cause the whole week to be canceled. After a series of events and some investigating by LaToya Cobb – who is on SGA and editor-in-chief of the campus newspaper – it is revealed the culprits behind all the chaos are Provost Jenkins and President Mims who yearned for a more "traditional” homecoming. Nevertheless, homecoming is saved and a smashing success.

jaleelwhite.jpgMovie Title: Throw Some D's on That: The Movie

Cast:
Jaleel White – Flavell
Flavell's Love Interest – Christina Milian
Dean Watts – Samuel L. Jackson
The midget from Road Trip – Shroom
Black Mike – Rick Ross
Sheriff Buford – Michael Richards

Plot Outline: A retarded kid named Flavell from the South side of Birmingham, Alabama becomes the first member of his family to go to college after he miraculously scores all the right answers on the SAT. When retard-hating Dean Watts cancels Flavell's scholarship, he and his weed-smoking midget roommate Shroom go on a road trip to steal the world's first set of 40" spinners, and turn Shroom's Caprice into a Donk fresh enough to win the $100,000 Car Show Competition, stay in school, and impress the girl whom Flavell is madly in love. But with local hoodlum Black Mike trying to steal the 40" rims and racist Sheriff Kyle Buford utter disdain for the melanin-proficient, Flavell and Shroom are going to have to do more than impress the judges.

Movie Title:Bored of Education

Cast:
Dominic West – Paul Worthington
Chaucer and Bacon – Mario's nostrils
Love Interest – Any R&B singer trying to get into movies

Plot Outline:Paul Worthington, a fresh-faced ivy-league educated young professor from crusty East Coast upbringing finds himself on the faculty of the hardened inner-city Frederick Douglass A&T. There he is assigned to an honors freshman English course but wonders why Chaucer and Bacon continue to go over the heads of his students until he realizes no one can possibly learn in the embroiled and hostile environment of metal detectors, barred windows, and the constant yell of step teams staging all day dance-offs right underneath the classroom window. But there is a deeper issue when he blows the whistle on a scholarship scandal including embezzlement trails that lead all the way to the office of the President. But all of his students are really good dancers. There are like 65 Penn Relay pens between them, but, no, none of them can actually read.

Movie Title: Let it Reign

Cast:
Esther Clemens - Keshia Knight Pulliam
Sorority Sisters of DKD – Various Rejected American Idol Contestants
Fraternity Brothers – Every guy who was a boyfriend to one of the girls on the cast of Girlfriends. 

Plot Outline:Ugly duckling Esther Clemens must overcome her awkward appearance to become the Queen of her college after the siddity sisters of Delta Kappa Delta sneakily sign her up for the Miss Crimson & Cobalt competition! After rocking the militant fro since freshman year, can she press and curl her way to black college royalty? Not if the hawaiian silky sisters of DKD have anything to say about it!

Contributors: Michael J. Feeney (Delaware State University, Class of 2005); Faraji Whalen (Morehouse College, Class of 2001); Sai Grundy (Spelman College, Class of 2004)

But Seriously...

Stomp The Yard is just one of several Hollywood interpretations of the HBCU experience. Here are several others that, for better or for worst, you might enjoy.

A Different World Season 1 & 2: Eighties babies knew exactly who Kanye was talking about when he shouted out Cree Summers. Lazy days at The Pit, Whitney and Dwayne, and of course, Denise Huxtable made Hillman College an experience from which we never wanted to graduate.

School Daze: Morehouse College alumni, and renowned director, did his black college experience proud with an ambitious musical about the fraternity Gamma Phi Gamma. If you haven't seen it already, WAKE UP!

Drumline: Director Charles Stone III and Nick Cannon made the band at fictional Atlanta A&T look hotter than anything Diddy could concoct. Sure Cannon didn't convince as the troubled drummer boy he tried to portray, but with Zoe Saldana in the mix, the message was clear: At HBCUs, even the band geeks could get the fine girl.

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