I randomly ended up cutting on the Australian Open about an hour ago, and I was greeted by the sight of my two favorite women's players, Venus and Serena Williams. They were playing two women I've never heard of. I think thier last names were something like Torrez and Benitez, or Ashford and Simpson...Really,who cares.

The only details worth comitting to memory were the little-assed tennis skirts on those big-assed Williams sister hindparts! Those young ladies ended up getting some of that Richard Williams strong-face DNA at birth, but their bodies are so right, that I still entertained the thought of what a threesome with them would be like. 

I mean, you have Serena, with the ass that defies gravity and the laws of Physics. Then you have Venus, with the long-assed legs that would look nice spread across my bed and up onto the wall on the other side of the room. Even tennis commentators had to give praise to Venus' butt on live television. When a sportscaster forgets that he's on the air and starts saying things he'd say to a woman leaving the club at 3:30 in the morning...Then you know it's a quality ass! 

Either one of these women are capable of tearing apart the average man. When paired with a below-average guy, a Williams sister could probably rip a motherf*cker's d*ck clean the f*ck off, then hand it back to you and saying "STOP CRYING AND WALK THAT SH*T OFF, B*TCH!"

I'm Leon, though. The plight of the average man does not apply to me. I have handled myself well in sexual situations involving myself and more than one woman. I also called in a favor at General Mills, and got them to hook up a Sex Breakfast of Champions cereal, just for my personal use. The resulting cereal, Skeeties, is illegal in 16 countries now, thanks to my exploits.

Skeeties

I might actually put a hurtin' on BOTH of 'em!

Ok...I admit. Now I'm just talking crazy. I do, however, know that I could at least hold my own. In the meantime, I'll be over here with my cereal, reading www.king-mag.com and www.listentoleon.net.